Desire vs. Capacity: Intro To Series

Hi! I’m back, and comin’ in hot with a new series :)

In light of my very brief (and entirely unplanned) hiatus from the blog this past week, I’ve been ruminating on a topic that’s been on my list to write about since this blog’s conception. Although my original plan was to write one post and be done with it, my rambling internal musings have made me realize that I have much more to say on the subject than just one week’s worth! So, over the next few weeks I want to talk about the real root of burnout: the disconnect between our desires and our capacity to embrace those desires.

Honestly, the reason for my time away was the sudden realization that I was teetering on the edge of burnout… a fact that I had been in denial of for about 2 weeks leading up to that point.

The scheduling progression of going from a whiplash travel weekend to a week of intensive volunteering, followed by some unexpected (and poorly structured) days off work, and topped with a sprinkling of bad nights of sleep, really did a number on me. After stumbling around for a couple weeks, feeling about as functional as a zombie, it finally dawned on me that I probably overdid myself and needed a reset. Of all my various commitments, it made the most sense to put the blog on the back burner for a hot second while I tried to get my head screwed on straight.

I know that burnout is an unfortunately common experience, so I wouldn’t be surprised if you’re familiar with the feeling. There is always the case of burnout that comes from unavoidable, high-stress circumstances that are out of our control. But the kind that I’m referring to is when our eyes are bigger than our stomachs, so to speak, and we actually choose to say “yes” to more than we’re really capable of handling in a given time. Anyone else struggle with this on the reg?

If we all know burnout is so miserable, why is it so easy to allow it to creep in?

I think the answer to this question comes from a few different directions. Foundationally, it’s hard to truly grasp the fact that we’re limited beings with limited physical and mental energy. That reality is only made harder by the environment we are typically surrounded by – hustle culture, other people we know who seem like they can “do it all”, and the seemingly endless avenues of social time, requests for help, and things to schedule that all vie for our attention.

Even our own natures can contribute to this! The kinds of things you’re naturally drawn toward – your goals, hobbies, and interests – all want your attention too… and you want to give it to them. If you’re like me and have a heart for serving others, then you know that this, too, can feed the potential for burnout in a complicated way. Isn’t it so frustrating when the willingness is there, but the energy isn’t? Where do you draw the line between being sacrificial and preserving your own well-being?

I do not have the answer to that last question, haha, so don’t expect to find that here. But as a person with limited capacity, maybe more limited than some, I’ve had my fair share of burnout scenarios that I could trace directly back to my own inability to recognize the gap between what I want to do and what I realistically can do. While I definitely can’t say I’ve figured out the secret sauce to avoiding this (clearly, since I’m literally writing this post-burnout, lol), my goal over these next few weeks is just to be real about the struggle and offer what little advice I can on the subject.

To start with, next week I want to lay bare the brutal reality of accepting your own limitations in the face of comparison. Comparison to people you know, comparison to people you don’t know – even comparison to the “ideal version” of yourself that you’re desperate to live up to. They say comparison is the thief of joy… and I’ll tell you that this particular breed of it has been stealin’ up my joy for years. Over the course of writing this post, I’ve literally cried about my own lack of capacity to get it done – so trust me, I get it.

The following week, I want to get personal about what burnout really feels like. I have found the creep of burnout to be so sneaky that sometimes it takes me a while to recognize the signs – but the longer I ignore them, the slower the recovery will be. Hence the aforementioned crying, lol.

Speaking of recovery, that’s how I want to wrap the series up: how can we return to normal after we overdo it? While I don’t have world-changing advice on this, it would be silly of me to have a series on this without addressing the realities of coming back to ourselves and giving ourselves the space (and grace) to do so.

Just a heads up: in an effort to avoid further overdoing myself, there will be a *planned* commercial break of sorts before the last week of the series. I will be involved with a friend’s wedding toward the end of July, so I have a pre-written and completely unrelated post that will go live as I recover from that delightful (but expectedly draining) experience :)

So join me next week as we jump right in! I’m excited about this topic, and I hope it carries some relevance to you as well.